ilovethepittsburghpenguins:

letsjustmeltaway:

n3rdlyfe:

Gas station, you are drunk.

Gas station, what the fuck are you doing?

Oh my god… Wtf

sneadly:

WHY ARE BOOKS NOT WATERPROOF 

I WANT TO READ IN THE SHOWER 

thedailywhat:

Lawn Ornaments of the Day: These Zombie Gnomes may be a bit tasteless following a weekend in which one man actually ate off another man’s face… but no one ever said a zombie apocalypse was avoidable.
[laughingsquid]

thedailywhat:

Lawn Ornaments of the Day: These Zombie Gnomes may be a bit tasteless following a weekend in which one man actually ate off another man’s face… but no one ever said a zombie apocalypse was avoidable.

[laughingsquid]

how to kiss

conversationparade:

[step 1] open your mouth as wide as possible. make sure to stick out your tongue as far as you can, too, since kisses are like, 90% that thing

[step 2] find someone to kiss. you will know they want to kiss because their tongue will also be extended at full length

[step 3] move in for the kill

animalstalkinginallcaps:

SISTER, IT IS BETTER THAT YOU SHOULD RUSH UPON THAT BLADE THAN ENTER THE CIRCLE WITH FEAR IN YOUR HEART. 
HOW DO YOU ENTER?
With perfect love and perfect trust.
GOOD. WELCOME TO OUR COVEN. ONLY A COUPLE OF GROUND RULES:
1. NO TAKING INTO YOURSELF ALL THE POWER OF MANON. WE HAD SOME TROUBLE WITH THAT A FEW YEARS AGO.
2. YOU CAN’T WEAR A TANK TOP TWO DAYS IN A ROW, AND YOU CAN ONLY WEAR YOUR HAIR IN A PONYTAIL ONCE A WEEK.
3. ON WEDNESDAYS WE WEAR PINK.
BLESSED BE.

animalstalkinginallcaps:

SISTER, IT IS BETTER THAT YOU SHOULD RUSH UPON THAT BLADE THAN ENTER THE CIRCLE WITH FEAR IN YOUR HEART. 

HOW DO YOU ENTER?

With perfect love and perfect trust.

GOOD. WELCOME TO OUR COVEN. ONLY A COUPLE OF GROUND RULES:

1. NO TAKING INTO YOURSELF ALL THE POWER OF MANON. WE HAD SOME TROUBLE WITH THAT A FEW YEARS AGO.

2. YOU CAN’T WEAR A TANK TOP TWO DAYS IN A ROW, AND YOU CAN ONLY WEAR YOUR HAIR IN A PONYTAIL ONCE A WEEK.

3. ON WEDNESDAYS WE WEAR PINK.

BLESSED BE.

ebullientefflorescence:

royalrunes:

So I have been in some form of a LOKI’D war with my friend and today I decided to LOKI’D her room. So another friend and I did this. She’ll keep finding them months from now. I feel super accomplished.

Holy Norse God. 

FINALLY, I can link my Facebook account to my Tumblr account so all my friends and family can see what I do online all day!
— No one, ever. (via scoldylox)
fuckyeahfeminists:

How The Zero Weeks Of Paid Maternity Leave In The U.S. Compares Globally

fuckyeahfeminists:

How The Zero Weeks Of Paid Maternity Leave In The U.S. Compares Globally